Making New Year’s Resolutions That Will Stick

We have nearly made it to the end of 2020. I don’t think this year has gone how any of us hoped or planned. I, for one, know that when I was making goals and resolutions for this year back in January I wasn’t planning on quarantine, mask mandates, or social distancing. That being said, not all of my goals flopped. I’m going to share some tips for how to help YOUR goals stick, even when everything gets turned upside down.

About two years ago, I realized that the way I was making New Year’s resolutions just wasn’t working. I was really motivated to make change for the first few weeks of the year, but by the time February or March rolled around, I was busy and tired as usual and just didn’t feel like making such big changes in my life. That reoccurring pattern is what prompted me to make a change.

SMART GOALS

If you are a goal-oriented or goal-motivated personality. Making sure that your goals are “SMART” may be enough to help them stick for you. SMART is an accronym. It stands for

• Specific – they must not be broad goals like “lose weight”, but a much more specific goal like “lose ten pounds”. Ask yourself these questions: What do I want to accomplish? Why is this goal important? Who is involved? Where is it located? Which resources or limits are involved?
• Measurable – this goes hand in hand with the goal being specific. Setting a number for weight loss, a bench press goal, an amount of money made, etc. Ask yourself these questions: How much? How many? How will I know when it is accomplished?
• Achievable – if your goals are too lofty, you: 1) won’t reach them, and 2) won’t feel motivated to even try. Knowing that you are capable is a big part of motivation to do something. Ask yourself these questions: How can I accomplish this goal? How realistic is this goal?
• Relevant – the goal needs to make sense. Ask yourself these questions: Does this seem worthwhile? Is this the right time? Does this match our other efforts/needs? Am I the right person to reach this goal?
• Time-bound – Without a due date or a timeline, it becomes easy to procrastinate putting the work in on your goal and this often leads to nothing being accomplished at all. Ask yourself these questions: When? What can I do six months from now? What can I do six weeks from now? What can I do today?

This method of setting goals can work fabulously for those who are motivated by their goals and who have the existing self-discipline to be consistent. I am not one of these people, so setting SMART goals hasn’t been any more effective that setting a regular goal.

MAKING ADJUSTMENTS INSTEAD OF BIG CHANGES

This is the method that works for me. Often when the end of the year would approach, I would think back on my year, my habits, and myself and think of all of the things I didn’t like. I disliked my lack of working out, I disliked my sleep schedule, I disliked my eating or spending habits…you get the idea. So I would set “goals” to radically change these things about myself. And then I would get discouraged (because I was literally trying to change 4-5 ingrained habits at a time), stop working on everything, and set the same goals the next year.

What I do now, instead, is I think back over the year and find things that I enjoy about my routines and habits. Here are some examples:

• I enjoy taking walks with my son
• I enjoy reading
• I enjoy writing this blog
• I enjoy taking pictures of my family and my dog
• I enjoy the feeling of managing my money
• I enjoy studying gospel and praying
• I enjoy being productive in the mornings
• I enjoy bullet journalling
• I enjoy dancing

Now I take all of these things that I ALREADY ENJOY and I think about how I could enjoy them MORE. Here’s how I would take these enjoyments and adjust them to make them “goals”:

• try to go on a walk twice a week or more with my son
• read something I enjoy before bed
• publish two blog posts every week
• take more pictures of my family and dog
• create a simpler budget and do spending checks every week
• set my alarm 30 minutes earlier to allow for productivity and gospel/prayer time
• Make a monthly title page in my bullet journal each month
• Play Just Dance on Saturdays.

I am motivated to do these things because every one is taking something that already brings me joy, and adding to it. Now I can always add a couple more challenging goals to my list, but setting goals like this allows me to make small adjustments to my happy habits effectively. And I’ve also noticed that increasing happy habits also weakens ones I don’t like as much. I may not “work out” regularly, but I do move my body with walking and dance. Waking up a little earlier is going to naturally encourage me to get to bed earlier as well. Giving myself a creative outlet through blogging and bullet journaling will increase my mindfulness. Weekly spending checks will help our money feel more in control.

Give it a try! Come up with a list of “happy habits” you already have and brainstorm ways to adjust them to bring even more joy into your life! I think you’ll notice that as you adjust your course just one degree at a time, you can turn a full 180 much faster than trying to do it all at once.

Happy New Year!